I sit here at my computer as the wind howls around me and a thunderstorm is in the midst. My Mother-in-Law has picked up my children to take them to their last official Awanas meeting at church and so I sit here in the quiet.. relishing it! No TV or radio.. just the sound of the keys beneath my fingers and the wind that whips through the trees in our yard.
I am 32 weeks pregnant now. I am still on bedrest, but my body is cooperating (finally)!! As long as I stay on bedrest, then there doesn't seem to be as high of a risk for him coming early like there was in the beginning. I praise the Lord for His faithfulness & that baby Josiah is doing so well & is healthy!! At a recent ultrasound we got to see him opening & closing his eyes. It was really neat to see! I will breathe a sigh of relief when he arrives and is healthy. For now, my body continues to contract & cramp and pain surrounds me. I am okay, but it's not a fun way to live when there's so many more fun things I could be doing right now instead of bedrest! hehe.
As I've had quite a bit of time to sit around and *think* about things.. My parenting skills have really been on my mind. When you have a strong-willed child and you're stuck on bedrest.. it can be a recipe for disaster as those boundary lines get pushed back further & further. But over the last 2 weeks.. God has really been giving me the sense to be more compassionate with both of my children. Right now, I have nowhere to be (except Dr's appointments) and I have no sense of urgency surrounding me. There are few deadlines I have to meet, and aside from the few people who come in to our home each day (to help us out) there is not even a sense of "time". My children, however, are stuck within the walls of our home (with the exception of outside to play when it isn't raining) and are quite bored by this new "lifestyle"!
My normal routine used to be very rushed & extremely busy! I had meetings, shows (as a Pampered Chef Consultant), play dates, homeschool days, church activities, doctor's appointments, household chores, and endless phone calls & texts! My day was hurried, had a purpose in all things, very structured, and very demanding. The biggest thing I have learned while being on bedrest is that I need to rest more in my every day life. I am more pleasant to be around and my children are no longer seen as a nuisance interrupting my day.. but a joyful asset to our family!
I enjoy the quiet times without them when friends/family take them on outings, but truthfully when they're not here.. I am really bored, ha! I am realizing that I became frustrated quicker & easier with them before bedrest than I do now. Praise the Lord for this time of reprieve to sit with them and snuggle while watching TV/movies or reading a book! Praise the Lord for the conversations we have, the pictures they color & show me, and for the flowers they bring to me from outside!!
So my question is.. are you enjoying your children? Life gets busy, and I get that! Life gets hard, and I completely understand! Parenting is not an easy job, and I am totally there with ya, Sister! But are we showering our children with Love or with the Law?
Love is patient & Love is kind! (1 Corinthians 13) The Laws of life only show us that we don't measure up! Even God doesn't deal with us in such a way.. He showers us with Love and leads us into the right direction. He knew we couldn't keep the Law and that's why He sent Jesus to us.. to save us from the Laws of Do's & Don't's. My heart has been pierced by this.. this very week!
Are we so consumed with what our children need to be doing in order to maintain our home, appearance, grades, activities, and life itself? Or are we showing them the Love of Jesus as we walk through this life together and embracing them as apart of our family for who they are? I know I so often have been in a place of trying to keep laws in order to have a cleaner home, better behavior, and have it "together" by outside appearances, but I will share something. Over the last couple of weeks as the Lord has spoken to my heart about my parenting.. and I've calmed down from the laws of what should or shouldn't be.. and allowed my children to be who they are (who GOD made them to be!) my life has gotten so much easier! My strong willed child is more compliant and more loving towards me. My shy and more quiet child feels like she can speak up and into things instead of fearing my reactions. Yes, that's painful to admit, but unfortunately it's true! Loving Jesus & Loving others.. that's what this life is all about , right?! Have you lost sight of that like I did?
God is faithful, Friends! I read a blog today about yelling at our children. I can completely identify with her!! The Important Thing About Yelling was the blog. It really penetrated my heart, because I've been there!!! Maybe this bedrest is what the Lord needed for me to go through in order to see the goodness of His mercy, His kindness, His Love, and His grace. He extends all of this to me.. who am I to not pass these sweet generosities on to my children?