38 Weeks & Counting Down!

I sit here and write this.. feeling blessed, so very blessed.. and worn out at the same time! I am almost 39 weeks pregnant. Twelve weeks ago, this achievement of reaching 9 months pregnant seemed impossible. I was put on bedrest as my body was preparing for delivery at 27 weeks into my pregnancy. My body was wracked with constant Braxon-Hicks contractions & cramping. We prayed and sought the Lord and begged him to allow our baby Josiah to hang out much longer within the confines of my body. Yet, here I am 3 months from that time, and am actually praying, "Lord, let Josiah come today!" Isn't that funny & ironic?

One of the greatest things about our story is the fact that Lydia & Elijah have fervently prayed that Josiah wouldn't come early. For 3 months, 2-3 times daily, this has been the words that poured from their hearts during each prayer time we have had. How cool is that!?! They are 6 & 4 years old and God has heard their cries and answered their prayers! I LOVE that! I love that He hears all of our prayers.. even the ones of the young children!!

From the nerve pain I now experience in my pelvis, night-time insomnia, and terrible acid reflux.. I am very ready to evict the little life that takes residence in my body! I praise the Lord I don't have any swelling though.. I imagine that would be quite terrible!! I am thankful that God gives very pregnant women the nesting instinct, or else it would be nearly impossible to take care of my home & children. How great & thoughtful our Lord is that he even gives me these sleepless nights. It definitely prepares me for what's ahead with a newborn baby!! I texted my sister earlier and jokingly said, "I now know what Grandma must have felt like when she got run over by a reindeer." I feel very worn down, but from what I've read online.. this feeling of puniness, exhaustion, and overall icky feeling can be a precursor to labor! So I have my fingers crossed, hehe!

Josiah is measuring between 7.5-8 lbs and is very healthy! My body is dilating & effacing as I prepare for my VBAC birth and I am ecstatic to meet this little guy!! I praise God for his healthy weight and from all we can tell.. a healthy baby!! My body has never prepared for labor before. After 2.5 years of chiropractic care.. it is doing it and I can't tell you how happy this makes me!! The hospital wasn't very pleased when I explained to them my desire for a VBA2C, but thankfully my Doctor is on board, and I know we can do this!!! I anxiously await for the contractions to become consistent! I am walking as much as I can and drinking lots of red raspberry tea... and praying, lots of praying for him to come!!! hehe

Lydia & Elijah are so excited as we prepare to meet Josiah. They love talking to & hugging my belly and including Josiah in every thing we do. It's absolutely precious & warms my heart immensely. How sweet my children are!!

I know the nights will be long and I understand there will be a big transition that takes place in our home, but we are very excited as we become a family of 5. I've been fervently asking the Lord to prepare our hearts for this transition; making it smooth for all of us. I have been sharing with Lydia & Eli about the needs & cries of a newborn. To which, at this point, they are understanding and okay with! We will see how long that understanding truly lasts!! I know the day will be here soon in which Josiah makes his appearance, but I will selfishly admit that the days drag on forever as we anticipate his arrival!!

So, here's to hoping that this is my last post as a pregnant woman and my next post will be pictures of our sweet newborn son and my birth story!!

38 weeks pregnant

Father's Day

Father's Day is always bittersweet for me. Bitter because my dad hasn't always been there for me. Sweet because my husband is an awesome dad! I make a great effort to really celebrate Andy on Father's Day. He is so selfless and so loving to our children! He works hard all day and comes home to let them climb all over him & wrestle. He will read to them, play video games with them, or even play on the Slip n Slide with them!!

He has taken on so much since I was put on bedrest 8 weeks ago. He is doing the shopping, taking care of our home & our children, cooking when meals aren't provided for us, and taking me to all my Dr's appointments. I am SO thankful for this wonderful man that God has given me!! 

When I was growing up, my dad was alot of fun! Not big on discipline, but very attentive to our needs as young children. He took us to the pool almost daily in the Summertime, he took us to music lessons, we went on "Daddy Dates" where we would go to the bowling alley, batting cages, or the movie theatre. These almost always resorted in going to Sonic for cheesticks or Weigel's for Icee's too! Those days were fun!!!

After some marital problems, our parents divorced the Summer we turned 12. It was a very difficult time for us. Even though parents say you don't have to choose sides.. from the moment our dad moved out of our family home.. we would forever be choosing sides. Even now, at 28 years old.. we have to choose sides.

 Fast forward five years...I went through a very difficult time when I turned 17. My mom had just divorced again from an abusive husband. My dad was in the process of another divorce with a woman I dearly loved and thought of as another Mom. My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me. I was dealing with way too much bullying at school which started with rumors & giggles from my twin sister. I felt cast aside.. and all alone. In fact, I planned to graduate high school early.. desperate to enter the "adult world" and escape the heartaches of childhood I was experiencing. 

It was at 17 that my dad threatened to disown me as his daughter which he stated would also mean removing me from his Will. Everything I did that he didn't "approve of" he would say, "And that's why your boyfriend broke up with you.." and other hurtful things such as this. I was quickly becoming bitter towards my father. Feeling so desperately alone and in a place of suicide. I (fortunately) couldn't bring myself to cause bodily harm. However, as I traveled a 2 lane road & 45 minute commute every day to school or work which was a major route for 18 wheeler trucks.. I would beg & plead with God. I would pray that one would lose control and hit my car allowing me to die. Every truck I passed the entire 45 minutes. With each one that safely passed I would break further into tears and ask God, "Why?" Why couldn't he just let me die?

I was almost 18 when I met Andy. In fact, our second date was for my 18th birthday. He was so quiet and had a peace about him. He was very comforting and listened to my heartaches. He held me tight as I cried more than once on his shoulder. He would pray with me and love me unconditionally.. in a way that was very foreign to me at the age of 17.. almost 18. It didn't take me long to feel as if this man was the one I would marry. Andy proposed to me 2 months later and we married 8 months after that. We just celebrated our 10th Anniversary! Has it always been easy? Absolutely not! There have been 2-3 times we could have easily called it quits! Have we grown up together? Most certainly! I was 18 & he was 21 when we married. We have truly grown together.. as people and in the Lord! Do I feel as if Andy rescued me out of my family situation? Absolutely, positively, without a doubt!! He showed me agape love.. when nobody else could! 

Now, more than 10 years later.. my dad and I have reconciled. He isn't the first person I call when I have good or bad news. However, I do call him 1-2 times a week. I've had to forgive him in more ways than one.. and even ask his forgiveness for being so bitter towards him. I've learned that just as a non-prosthetic amputee cannot run a marathon... my dad cannot always be the dad I wish he was. 

It's been a long road, but I can accept where God has brought me from and know that even though my dad isn't maybe what I wish I had in a father.. I have a Heavenly Father who LOVES & ADORES me! He considers me to be a masterpiece. Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago."  I can rejoice, because my Father in Heaven also gave me a wonderful husband who dearly loves our children and I get to celebrate Andy and my Heavenly Father on Father's Day!

Psalm 103:13 "The Lord is like a Father to His children; tender & compassionate to all who fear Him."

34 Weeks.. Almost There!!

I have made it to 34 weeks!!

And after a scare of Josiah turning breech (below) at 31 weeks.. he is finally head down again!! Yay!

Last week, (33 weeks) I was told I had protein in my urine and was now considered pre-toxemic. I was put on even more strict bedrest and told that we *have* to get Josiah to 35 weeks (for his health & safety) and if my protein levels raise from 1 (where they were) to 5, then they would have to take him immediately to keep him & me out of danger. That was a scary appointment!!

I went back a few days later and praise God my levels hadn't risen!! 

Now, at 34 weeks, I went to my appt (I am going twice a week now for extra monitoring) and had no protein in my urine this time. Thank you Jesus!! I know it is the many, many prayers surrounding me during this pregnancy!!! I did find out that I have started dilating too. I told the PA that I'm not sure if dilating this early is a good thing or not, but I am a little giddy about it!! I never dilated with Lydia or Elijah and as I pray and hope for a VBAC with this pregnancy.. dilation is a good sign it will happen!!!

Lydia & Elijah have been so sweet & gracious to me throughout this bedrest process!! They help me and demand that I stay sitting at all times, ha! They have been such sweet & selfless children (most of the time!) haha!!

Lydia was so excited when their Mimi took them to get a toy! She got some colorful hair chalk!!

She has said for a very long time how much she wants pink hair!! She's so cute!!! 

After a difficult day I was really needing some quiet time. I sent Lydia & Elijah to watch TV in our bedroom. After a little while (and some nice quiet) Elijah comes out of our room like this!! He had raided my lipstick (of all things!!) Crazy boy!!! The funniest part of this picture is that the shirt he's wearing says, "Mommy's Little Tough Guy" !! LOL!

What God is Teaching Me on Bedrest

I sit here at my computer as the wind howls around me and a thunderstorm is in the midst. My Mother-in-Law has picked up my children to take them to their last official Awanas meeting at church and so I sit here in the quiet.. relishing it! No TV or radio.. just the sound of the keys beneath my fingers and the wind that whips through the trees in our yard.

I am 32 weeks pregnant now. I am still on bedrest, but my body is cooperating (finally)!! As long as I stay on bedrest, then there doesn't seem to be as high of a risk for him coming early like there was in the beginning. I praise the Lord for His faithfulness & that baby Josiah is doing so well & is healthy!! At a recent ultrasound we got to see him opening & closing his eyes. It was really neat to see! I will breathe a sigh of relief when he arrives and is healthy. For now, my body continues to contract & cramp and pain surrounds me. I am okay, but it's not a fun way to live when there's so many more fun things I could be doing right now instead of bedrest! hehe.

As I've had quite a bit of time to sit around and *think* about things.. My parenting skills have really been on my mind. When you have a strong-willed child and you're stuck on bedrest.. it can be a recipe for disaster as those boundary lines get pushed back further & further. But over the last 2 weeks.. God has really been giving me the sense to be more compassionate with both of my children. Right now, I have nowhere to be (except Dr's appointments) and I have no sense of urgency surrounding me. There are few deadlines I have to meet, and aside from the few people who come in to our home each day (to help us out) there is not even a sense of "time". My children, however, are stuck within the walls of our home (with the exception of outside to play when it isn't raining) and are quite bored by this new "lifestyle"!

My normal routine used to be very rushed & extremely busy! I had meetings, shows (as a Pampered Chef Consultant), play dates, homeschool days, church activities, doctor's appointments, household chores, and endless phone calls & texts! My day was hurried, had a purpose in all things, very structured, and very demanding. The biggest thing I have learned while being on bedrest is that I need to rest more in my every day life. I am more pleasant to be around and my children are no longer seen as a nuisance interrupting my day.. but a joyful asset to our family!

I enjoy the quiet times without them when friends/family take them on outings, but truthfully when they're not here.. I am really bored, ha! I am realizing that I became frustrated quicker & easier with them before bedrest than I do now. Praise the Lord for this time of reprieve to sit with them and snuggle while watching TV/movies or reading a book! Praise the Lord for the conversations we have, the pictures they color & show me, and for the flowers they bring to me from outside!!

So my question is.. are you enjoying your children? Life gets busy, and I get that! Life gets hard, and I completely understand! Parenting is not an easy job, and I am totally there with ya, Sister! But are we showering our children with Love or with the Law?

Love is patient & Love is kind! (1 Corinthians 13) The Laws of life only show us that we don't measure up! Even God doesn't deal with us in such a way.. He showers us with Love and leads us into the right direction. He knew we couldn't keep the Law and that's why He sent Jesus to us.. to save us from the Laws of Do's & Don't's. My heart has been pierced by this.. this very week!

Are we so consumed with what our children need to be doing in order to maintain our home, appearance, grades, activities, and life itself? Or are we showing them the Love of Jesus as we walk through this life together and embracing them as apart of our family for who they are? I know I so often have been in a place of trying to keep laws in order to have a cleaner home, better behavior, and have it "together" by outside appearances, but I will share something. Over the last couple of weeks as the Lord has spoken to my heart about my parenting.. and I've calmed down from the laws of what should or shouldn't be.. and allowed my children to be who they are (who GOD made them to be!) my life has gotten so much easier! My strong willed child is more compliant and more loving towards me. My shy and more quiet child feels like she can speak up and into things instead of fearing my reactions. Yes, that's painful to admit, but unfortunately it's true! Loving Jesus & Loving others.. that's what this life is all about , right?! Have you lost sight of that like I did?

God is faithful, Friends! I read a blog today about yelling at our children. I can completely identify with her!! The Important Thing About Yelling was the blog. It really penetrated my heart, because I've been there!!! Maybe this bedrest is what the Lord needed for me to go through in order to see the goodness of His mercy, His kindness, His Love, and His grace. He extends all of this to me.. who am I to not pass these sweet generosities on to my children?

What the Lord is Doing!

Here I sit at 29 weeks pregnant. I fight loneliness from being so isolated, but many friends text/call/email me throughout the day and that is definitely helpful. I look around at the "stuff" that needs to be put away, or the dishes undone in the sink, or the dust bunnies gathering in the corners and it makes me cringe.. just a little. I'm not an overtly neat person, but I do like order. I also hate dirty floors! But the Lord is teaching me to let those things go. For this unborn life inside me.. is of much more importance than dust bunnies!

At my appointment yesterday I was told I am not doing enough bed resting. My body has started cramping because of it now too.. in addition to the Braxton-Hicks that plague me the moment I stand up until the moment I return to sitting. My doctor is concerned that my uterus is being way too overworked for only 29 weeks pregnant. Thankfully, I am not dilating.. only the softening of my cervix is still apparent. She gave me medication to calm my uterus, told me more bedrest, and to stay hydrated. Above all.. she said I am to do absolutely nothing! I was warned that if my uterus hasn't calmed down by Thursday that I'm looking at Home Health having to come in for around the clock monitoring & the next step is hospitalization. I left her office in tears.

My children, being 6 & 4, are helpful but still need their Momma. They still want to eat breakfast & lunch or for me to get that coloring book that's put away on the top shelf that they can't reach. They still run out of toilet paper in the bathroom or want to be tucked in at naptime. It seems impossible to do absolutely nothing when you're already a Mom. I sent our prayer requests to friends & church family. Calls/Text/Emails began pouring in.. asking what they can do? Can they come make lunch for my kids? Can they pre-make lunches for them? Can they come & take them to the park or to the zoo for a day so I can rest?!

Andy came home from work with alot of questions I couldn't answer. He had talked with people he works with and they didn't understand my situation either. I told some friends who also had questions that I felt like I couldn't answer. Truth is.. I felt so overwhelmed at the office visit that I didn't ask too many questions. As I began trying to Google answers (and coming up with none, I might add) a friend brought dinner to us. She is a newer friend to us, but she sat down and started talking to me. She asked me how I was and something she said made me think to ask her profession. She told me she is a doctor! She practiced family medicine but did alot of her residency in OB care. So I shared with her my situation and asked for her insight. She was able to give me peace & understanding.. a 2nd opinion, if you will. She was a complete God-send to me at that moment when I needed peace!

After dinner, Andy went and got the mail. He brought me a letter addressed to either one of us. He let me open it. It had no name listed on it.. in fact the return address was our address. I opened the card and it said, "I hope this can help out your family a little bit" or something to that affect. No name & no signature. Then, I looked down at what had fallen out of the card & I literally began to weep...

You see, my doctor told me I had to cancel my Pampered Chef shows. I had to give one of them away and the others were turned into catalog parties. It's hard to get new parties off of catalog parties though! My business is suffering right now, big time. What I make in a paycheck covers our van payment and some other bills we pay each month. We were running low on funds BIG time. Unsure of how many of these bills would be paid... I clung to the fact that I knew God, my Redeemer, would rescue us & provide for us. As I looked at the check.. it's nearly the exact amount of what I would make in a month if I were doing my Pampered Chef business!! God had provided for us in a BIG way!!! I could do nothing more than weep with gratitude.

Several nights ago, while praying for God's hand to be upon us & help us.. He spoke to me to read the book of Habakkuk. This isn't necessarily a book I would sit down to intentionally read. It's a small book, and just not one you think of immediately when going to read the Bible. However, I heard Him clear as day tell me to read it. It was about midnight, so I pulled it up on my phone. And here are some verses that popped out at me!

Habakkuk 1:5 "Look around at the nations; look & be amazed! For I am doing something in your own day, something you wouldn't believe even if someone told you about it."

2:4 "Look at the proud! They trust in themselves, and their lives are crooked, but the righteous will live by their faithfulness to God."

3:2 "I have heard all about you, Lord. I am filled with awe by your amazing works. In this time of our deep need, help us again as you did in years gone by."

3:17-19 "Even though the fig trees have no blossoms, and there are no grapes on the vines; even though the olive crop fails, and the fields lie empty and barren; even though the flocks die in the fields, and the cattle barns are empty, yet I will rejoice in the Lord! I will be joyful in the God of my salvation! The Sovereign Lord is my strength! He makes me as surefooted as a deer, able to tread upon the heights."

How faithful & how good is our God!!!! He is surely to be praised for His faithfulness & His gracious hands upon us during this time!

Bedrest Update!

On Thursday, I got the test results for my preterm labor fetal-fibronectin test. The nurse called me and said it's positive. This isn't the kind of result you want with this type of test. It means, preterm labor is imminent. She tells me it can be as soon as 2 weeks or later. I am told that I am on strict bedrest and I must cancel my Pampered Chef Show that is scheduled (that night!) I have been a little concerned (with my Braxton-Hicks & pain levels) how I would make it through this show that was also 45 minutes away, but I was excited about this party.. because I had coached my host well & she was excited for a great party!! Those are my favorite ones to do!! Nonetheless, I found a replacement and I stayed home. The nurse wanted me back in the office the next day.

Friday afternoon, Andy accompanied me as I went through another cervical exam, ultrasound, and fetal non-stress test. The exam showed that I am still not dilated, but my cervix is very soft (which we knew!) and the ultrasound showed that I am not in immediate danger as my cervix hasn't shortened. The doctor tells me, "We've caught this early! Which is a good thing! We must be proactive!!" She explains that I will be in the office for testing & monitoring twice a week now. I will be on bedrest. I can go on non-stressful outings for short periods of time & can make my children's lunches, but absolutely no cooking and no cleaning. I am to rest, hydrate, rest, hydrate, and so forth. 

At first glance, this all may sound wonderful, right? You're told by the doctor you can't do anything but sit & sleep? How wonderful! I must tell you though.. I am a social person! I get such a buzz from being with friends and socializing with them!! Being on bedrest is kind of lonely for me.. already.. 6 days in! It's also hard for me to look around our home and see things that need to be done or put away, etc and not be able to do anything about it. Thankfully, Lydia is 6 & Elijah is 4. They are pretty self-sufficient, but they are also having to learn I cannot do for them as I was doing before. This is a learning curve for all of us! I am definitely learning to give up control!

The other thing I'm learning is to ask & receive!! Since I was young I have been the type of person that if something needs to be done, then I'll do it! I grew up where money wasn't prevalent and at 14 my sister and I started our own babysitting business just to have money for our lunches at school. Our parents were newly divorced and we didn't have alot of luxury in our teenage years. We worked!! It's hard for me to ask for help.. It's hard for me to receive help! But God is already teaching me, mostly because I don't have a choice, that help is needed and to allow others to bless me with their help for my family and me. Truthfully, the blessings have been overwhelming & I am so very very grateful for all they are doing for us!!

So, I suppose my blogging will become about my journey through bedrest now. I have 8-10 weeks on bedrest at this point. At 28 weeks now, my doctor hopes to get me past 34 weeks and to atleast 36! She is really hoping for 38! It will be interesting to see what the Lord teaches me during this time! 

My full time job used to be Mom: Homeschool Teacher, Cook, & Maid and Pampered Chef Consultant! These roles are changing for a short time and my new job is... growing a baby! 

27 Wks Pregnant and a bit Concerned..

I am 27 weeks & 3 days today!

In my last 2 pregnancies I really enjoyed being pregnant. There are quite a few aches & pains that accompany pregnancy.. but that aside.. I loved it! I love feeling the baby move & grow! Despite stretch marks and my lumps & bumps.. I love the way my body looks! Maybe I should more specifically say.. I love the way my body looks in clothes, ha! I love that you can eat and not have to worry about the feeling you get when you "wish you could unbutton your pants, but how inappropriate is that?!" You have on maternity/stretch pants.. you're almost always getting to wear COMFY clothes!! I love pregnancy!!

I will be completely honest though and say.. this pregnancy has been hard for me. Really hard. I don't want to complain too much or whine, because I have friends that I know who suffer with infertility & miscarriages and I know their hearts are shattered by such tragedy. I know they would take my place in 2 seconds and endure the hardships of pregnancy like a badge of honor. So, please, hear me when I say that I love being pregnant with my little Josiah.. even though it hasn't been easy this time around.

For the last couple of weeks I've had many Braxton-Hicks. They start out just feeling kind of weird, but after so many.. they begin to hurt. When I stand, they come on alot more frequent and the evenings are the worst in terms of this for me. I'm also dealing with alot of ligament pain. The inside of my leg up through the right side of my belly feel like it's on fire much of the time when I move. The ligament pain is a dear old friend, but I will say.. she came back with a vengeance this time around much worse than my previous pregnancies. The Braxton-Hicks.. this often, this painful.. it's all new to me. So I tell my Doctor of this news today.

She is concerned about actual contractions & does a pelvic exam. She tells me I am not dilated (praise the Lord) but my cervix is much more softened than it is supposed to be and that is cause for concern. She is doing a test to check for the possibility of preterm labor and I get those results tomorrow. In the meantime, I am told to rest and I may have to look at lowering my activity level. I'll tell ya.. aside from doing my cooking shows.. I feel pretty worthless in terms of activity as it is. I do minimal house cleaning and alot of couch warming!!

However, this does mean that if I am to lower my activity level that it will cut down or out my ability to do my cooking shows. If I may be honest..With the pain I experience.. this comes as a bit of a relief.  However, as I look out the window and see my van that I so dearly love & am grateful for.. the inability to do my cooking shows concerns me, because it is with my PC income that the van payment is paid!

I do not want to overdo it so much that I cause myself to go into labor and put Josiah in harms way, so I will do what I am told to the best of my ability if it comes down to bedrest. I know that God is faithful & He will provide for our family financially, physically, & emotionally!! It is hard being in this phase of not knowing and being concerned though. However, I serve a God who does know.. EVERYTHING!! He will provide & care for Josiah & me and the needs of our family!!

Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart & lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways look to Him and He will direct your paths."  He is FAITHFUL!!

~I look forward to when I can look back at this post and see exactly what God did to care for our needs during this time!! It will be a joy!!~

Dogwood Arts Festival Fun 2013!

Last weekend we went to the Dogwood Arts Festival! We had such a fun time with my Mom! First we went to lunch and then walked around the Festival. They had alot there for the kids: Face Painting, Sock Puppets, Sidewalk Chalk Art, & Coloring Activities. Lydia & Elijah enjoyed looking at the art and the performers. Most of all, they loved all of the dogs on Market Square that they got to stop & pet!! We stopped and ended our fun at Rita's Italian Ice! They enjoyed that too!!

 Here are some pictures of our fun together!!!

22 Weeks & Changes in our Home!

I am now 22 weeks pregnant.

 Here I am at 20 weeks pregnant.

We are getting things ready for little Josiah as he's growing bigger each day and the kids' excitement is growing too!!

We decided to put them both in the same room and Josiah is Lydia's old room. We painted both rooms a really pretty sky blue. Everybody helped.. even Cassie tried to!

So now the kids' room looks like this:

Lydia in one corner and Elijah in the opposite corner! They both love their new spaces and the pictures are true to form.. Elijah is so messy, lol!!

We went through a small scare with the pregnancy where Josiah wasn't gaining enough weight. They put me on a diet of EATING and now he has caught up with where he's supposed to be! I go back again this week for another ultrasound. They couldn't get all the pictures they needed of his heart, so they want to check one more time to see if they can get it.

During the scan he was curled up in a corner with his legs over his head. He had LOTS of room to move in, but preferred being in the corner (as he normally does) curled up in a ball. He's such a funny little guy, already!

Facing us.. face on right, belly on left.

I praise the Lord that he is healthier now & moving around much more too!! For now, they've released me from the diabetic diet. I do the glucose test on Wednesday though (3/20) and we will decide then if I need to be back on the diabetic diet. For now, I am just trying to be mindful of what I eat. 

I am just praising the Lord for this little life within me and trying hard to savor each moment.. especially when the ligament pains hit (they are quite painful!) hehe.

Surprise!

On February 13th we had an ultrasound appointment to find out if our baby was a boy or girl. I jokingly told everyone, "It's really just verification of a girl!" We were all confident in having a girl! Lydia & Elijah were fully convinced that our baby was a girl and due to our "Zoey Experience" we named our baby Zoey Noelle. Noelle, because "she" was our Christmas Miracle!! People inquired what boy names we had, and I told them, "We have several we like, but none that we've decided on. Truly, because we feel like the baby is a girl."

We counted down the days til our appointment on the 13th with great excitement!! Lydia & Elijah were elated as they called my name from the waiting room. We got into the ultrasound room and I shared with the tech, "We think the baby is a girl." The kids glowing with excitement both echoed my sentiments of baby being a girl. I explained to the tech, "They are fully expecting that baby is a girl!" She took a quick peek and said, "Umm.. I think I see something" to which Andy replied, "... Well.. I think I saw it too.." She went on to look at the other organs and came back to the anatomy check. She said, "Well, Mom & Dad.." and we both said, "We see!" and she wrote this on the ultrasound...

The arrow is pointing to the anatomy of a BOY!!! Imagine our surprise!!!! lol! After the tech quietly wrote these words she kindly leaned over and whispered, "I'll let you explain this to them (Lydia & Elijah) in private."

I couldn't stop laughing.. truly! God has such a sense of humor and it cracked me UP! We walked to the private room to meet with the Dr and Lydia sadly says, "Mommy.. that lady never told us if our baby is a boy or a girl.." We walked in and I said, "Do you want to know.. really want to know?" They both shook their heads with SUCH excitement. So I told them our baby is a boy! Lydia had huge tears well up in her eyes. It was so pitiful and I hugged her and told her it is okay to feel disappointment. Elijah jumped up & down yelling, "I want a girl! I don't want a boy!" The Dr walked in and said, "What's the matter with you guys? You look so sad!" She giggled when I told her the issue, but was very empathetic with both of them!!

We tried cheering them up by taking them to Chickfila. They were excited about that and asked if they could play on the playground. We told them of course they could! We got to the Chickfila (not our usual location) and realized that the play area was outdoors... and it was raining!!! They were heartbroken again. It was a sad day for Lydia & Elijah!!

Today, February 17th, they are coming around! We have named him Josiah David and they are beginning to talk to my belly again and rub it. Now instead of hearing, "I love you Zoey!" we hear, "I love you Josiah!" with such love & compassion! Funny thing is.. Elijah really routed for the name Josiah, but consistently forgets his name. He often says, "The baby" and Lydia will say, "You mean Josiah?" Then, he answers, "Yes! Bosiah" He keeps saying it with a B instead of a J. He will get it though!!

Meaning of Name:

Josiah = The Lord Saves

David = Beloved

In the meantime, Josiah is healthy but really underweight. I have been put on a diet of EATING and told not to be on my Insulin Resistance Diet  (aka gestational diabetes diet) for now, but to eat as much as I possibly can. I go back in 10 days to have another scan and hope that he has gained weight!! At this point in the pregnancy (18 weeks) I've only gained 2 lbs. I pray that I (and Josiah) will gain more when I go back! Aside from that, he is a fighter & doing great!!!

Do you see his little foot? It's a perfect imprint with 5 perfect little toes!

Side profile picture. His chin is down to his chest. His head is on the right.

Thank you all for your continued prayers for our precious little Josiah!! 

We are so excited and so thankful for the Lord saving his life and allowing us to love him!

16 Weeks Pregnant!

I am now 16 weeks pregnant!

I went to the Dr today to check on the pregnancy and further discuss VBAC info. I was very pleased with my visit as many fears I had were reassured and my Dr and her PA are very supportive of VBAC and laid back about the process! The Lord has provided a Doula for me to use during my labor and I'm hoping that with her help I will also avoid having the c-section. God is just putting so many things into place for me!! I'm getting more & more excited!!

My Insulin Resistance is doing really well and my blood sugar levels are staying low now! This is making me very happy as I may actually avoid the Gestational Diabetes.. which will make me VERY happy!!

Today, baby's heartbeat was really strong! I didn't realize that the baby was so high in my abdomen at this point, but he/she was hanging out right at my belly button!! I'm shocked that (despite how I look) I haven't gained any weight in this pregnancy yet. Although, that makes me happy too in hopes of not keeping extra baby weight on for a long time.. after baby is born! We go back on Feb 13th (2 weeks) for the gender scan! Lydia & Elijah are going with us and are so excited about it!! I look forward to seeing their faces when they see the baby move around!!

Now, as time is beginning to get closer and go by faster.. I'm just trying to figure out living arrangements! I have 2 options with our 3 bedroom home!

1) Put Lydia & Elijah in the same room together for about a year, until baby is better adjusted to sleeping schedules and is less needy. Then moving baby in with whichever child is the same gender!

2) Lydia wants to share a room with the baby (if baby is a girl. Although, I am feeling certain that the baby is a girl!) I just can't decide if this is the best way to go for now. That will be much interruption for her! Also, while baby is napping, then she won't be able to go into her room like she wants. 

I'm leaning more toward option 1 at this point. I do have some more time to figure it out though, hehe! 

Lydia's 6th Birthday Party Celebration!

We were planning for a small party at our house, but after being very sick that week I wasn't able to do that. So, we called up the Chickfila and we were so excited they were able to accommodate us at the last minute!! They were fantastic and we all had a great time!!! Here are pictures for the memory of our day celebrating Lydia!

On our way to the party!!

A few girls have arrived!

We decorated Cupcakes!!!

Brain Freeze!!

A pretty purse that Anna Grace got for Lydia.. she can color it and then wash it whenever she wants to re-color it different colors!

Fun was had by all!!!

2nd Trimester!!

Tomorrow, I am 14 weeks pregnant! Time is already flying and my baby bump is growing! Praise the Lord, baby is thriving and doing great!!

When I went to my 12 week appointment, I was surprised they had me scheduled for an Ultrasound. I was really excited to see the baby! She put the wand on my tummy and baby was curled up in a little ball. The lady tapped my stomach a few times with the wand and baby jumped up and started wiggling ALL over the place! It was SO neat to watch.. very, very active little one! I caught right up in my measurements to where I'm supposed to be (I had been a week or so off). "She" is doing great!!

Here's a great profile picture!

This week I've been very sick with an Upper Respiratory Infection, but thankful to my in-laws.. they took Lydia & Elijah for me, so I could truly rest and get well. I spent a week in bed, and finally am beginning to feel better!!

Here's a picture of me at 12 weeks. It's amazing with this being my 3rd pregnancy how fast I've started showing!!

This week I'm meeting with a Dietitian. Before I was pregnant and diagnosed with PCOS, I was told that I'm insulin resistant. Now that I am pregnant I am very concerned about developing gestational diabetes. So I meet with her next week.. I'm a bit apprehensive about it, but if it helps then it will be worth it!!

No hot fudge on top of rocky road ice cream & freshly baked chocolate chip cookies for me this pregnancy (that's what I craved with Lydia & Elijah-- and LOTS of it, haha!) Maybe that means I won't gain as much weight??

For now, we are healthy & doing well!